


only you

by drawingravity



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drabble Collection, Fluff, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Self-Indulgent, brief mentions of other members
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-05
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:00:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24018655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drawingravity/pseuds/drawingravity
Summary: short drabbles, random dojae ideas that wouldn't leave me alone
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung
Comments: 4
Kudos: 44





	1. falling in love

They’re nothing alike. Doyoung likes to do everything by the book, likes to have routine and consistency. Jaehyun likes to go with the flow, likes to be spontaneous and be surprised by unpredictable things. So when they’re spotted sitting together in a cafe, hands intertwined on the table with smiles on their faces, it’s not unreasonable that their friends are shocked, stunned silence settling over them seven tables away. 

Ten is the first to recover, ready to slide out of their booth and mock them, but is stopped by Taeyong, who shakes his head and pulls him back down sitting. They watch as Doyoung rolls his eyes at Jaehyun followed by a glare at Jaehyun’s no doubt teasing remark, and they relax at the familiarity of the scene. It’s typical antics for Jaehyun to rile Doyoung up, but what is new is the way Jaehyun lifts their interlinked hands and presses a soft kiss to the back of Doyoung’s hand, and the subsequent blush that blossoms on Doyoung’s cheeks. 

It’s so endearing that Taeyong can’t help but coo, seeing his best friend in such an enamoured state, and he snickers at the stupefied expression on Ten’s face. He feels an odd sense of accomplishment, he remembers how everyone except him laughed at the idea of Doyoung and Jaehyun dating, but as he watches them laugh quietly absorbed in their own world, he knows he was right. They’re nothing alike, but it’s just like them to do the unexpected and fall in love with each other.


	2. strangers

Their eyes meet by coincidence in the streets of the bustling city, people pushing their way through others to get to their destinations, things to do and people to see. But as Doyoung stands there, waiting for his boyfriend to pick him up, his eyes lock onto the stranger across the street. 

It shouldn’t mean anything, he’s made accidental eye contact with strangers before, but something about this, about him, seem almost purposeful. And it’s not just him, for the way the stranger seems equally engaged, uncaring of the pedestrians shouldering him in their haste to complete their errands. Doyoung almost feels exposed, with how intense the stranger’s gaze is, never leaving his eyes. It should feel intrusive and unwelcome, but for reasons unexplainable to him it doesn’t, and he can’t find it within himself to break their gaze either. They stay like that for seconds or minutes, Doyoung isn’t sure, and anyone observing would think they were absurd, and Doyoung would agree, but lets his eyes greedily drink in the other man nonetheless, captivated by the long lashes and the hint of dimples that begin to appear. 

“Doyoung!” The familiar voice of his boyfriend forces Doyoung to tear his eyes away, but it almost feels reluctant. “Hope you didn’t wait for long.” 

Doyoung shakes his head, and lets Kun take his hand to lead him to his car, humming at his recount of the busy traffic. He’s taken three steps before the urge to turn back begins to build in him, and after another five steps, he whips his head around, expecting to see those brown eyes again, but the stranger is no longer there. 

It isn’t until later that night, Kun’s steady breaths deep asleep beside him, that Doyoung lets himself recall those entrancing eyes again, selfishly hoping to see them again once more.


	3. come over

What a drab. The alcohol he consumed earlier long lost its buzz, and the longer Jaehyun stood there listening to his potential hook up for the night sweet talk him, the more unappealing it seemed. He knew it was a dick move, stringing the guy along the whole night only to be uninterested at the last minute, but they both knew it, with the way Jaehyun hummed half-arsedly to whatever the guy was suggesting. 

But as much as Jaehyun was no longer interested, the man seemed equally determined to see what they started through. He leaned in even closer and moved to whisper something next to his ear when Jaehyun felt his phone vibrate in his back pocket. Perfect timing.

Jaehyun pushed away with an apologetic smile for show, and a quick glance downwards showed a text from Doyoung.

**Doyoung**

_U free?_

It was bizarre the effect Doyoung had on him. Just a simple text yet Jaehyun was already hooked at implication, and he grinned.

**Me**

_Thought u were busy tonight_

**Doyoung**

_Not anymore. Come over?_

**Me**

_Be there in 10._

“Sorry I have to go.” Jaehyun didn’t even bother waiting for a reply before he was out the door.

Doyoung’s dorm was just as shitty as Jaehyun’s, but the fact that Doyoung lived alone and was the type of person who cared about his sheets’ thread count meant Jaehyun could be unashamedly loud and bask in soft bedsheets afterwards as he lay there catching his breath.

“You asshole,” came Doyoung’s voice from the bathroom. “I told you not to mark me on my neck.”

“That’s not what you were saying before,” Jaehyun replied with a smirk, eyes lingering over the red splotches as Doyoung crawled onto the bed.

This close, Jaehyun could see Doyoung’s cheeks flush a pretty pink.

“Shut up, Jung.” Jaehyun hissed as Doyoung’s bony elbow jabbed him in his side. “Move over, you’re taking up all the space.”

Jaehyun groaned as he was pushed aside, the euphoric feelings from earlier beginning to fade. He sighed as mentally prepared himself to get up and look for his clothes, and sat up to do so when he felt an arm push him back down. Surprised, he turned his head to see Doyoung snuggling closer, his eyes already closed.

This was new. They never cuddled after sex, and the one time Jaehyun tested the waters if he could spend the night was met with a firm no and a very cold trek back to his dorm. Jaehyun was about to open his mouth and ask what this meant when Doyoung opened one eye and frowned.

“It’s cold,” he grumbled, and burrowed his face further into his pillow. “The heater’s broken.”

Jaehyun couldn’t help but smirk, he was well versed with Doyoung enough to know what it really meant. “You’re always using me for my body, I see how it is,” he teased, settling down more comfortably.

He could already anticipate the way Doyoung was going to withdraw his arm and kick him out, so he turned and wrapped his arm around Doyoung’s waist, tangling their legs together.

“I’m kidding,” he said quickly, not budging against Doyoung’s squirming limbs. And although Jaehyun knew not to kick a gift horse in the mouth, he could help but delight in the annoyed display Doyoung put on, chuckling a little at Doyoung’s obvious regret.

“Shut up and sleep,” was Doyoung’s response, and Jaehyun hummed as he pulled the covers over them, quickly drifting off into a deep slumber, feeling a lot warmer than he could recently remember. 


	4. departure

Doyoung’s not here.

Jaehyun tries to let his face fall, but it feels a punch to the stomach. He grips the handle of his suitcase a little tighter, and avoids the knowing looks Johnny and Sicheng exchange.

“We’re going to miss you, Jae,” Johnny says with a wry smile.

“I’ll miss you guys too,” Jaehyun replies, and when he blinks his eyes feel suspiciously wet.

They exchange more goodbyes, cheesy hugs, and all too soon it’s time for Jaehyun to step through the gates for international departure. He still needs time to pass through security and all, but he lingers for another minute, and another, until five minutes turn into ten and the chasm in his heart grows larger and larger which each passing second.

“I have to go now,” he croaks, and Johnny and Sicheng nod in sad understanding.

Each step feels heavier than the last, and Jaehyun tells himself not to look back, to not scan the sea of people for a face that won’t appear.

He’s next in line when he hears it. The huffing, the loud frantic footsteps, and for a second, the airport feels suspended in time, as heads turn at the commotion.

“Jaehyun!”

Security pauses their I.D checking, other travellers momentarily stop their goodbyes with their loved ones. It’s nothing the airport has never seen before, a late traveller, a late friend arriving at the send off, another clumsy fool. Jaehyun feels the breath knocked out of him.

The world jolts back into motion, security lets the woman ahead of Jaehyun through, the family to the right of the gates share one last hug, announcements of the delayed flight sound through speakers.

“Next,” the security man beckons him forwards, but Jaehyun doesn’t register anything except for a dishevelled Doyung standing in front him, breathing heavily and the distraught furrow of his eyebrows.

“You’re here,” Jaehyun breathes, and lets himself be guided out of queue as Doyung bows hastily in apology to the people behind him.

Doyoung is _here_ , and Jaehyun grabs Doyoung’s wrist to anchor himself to reality. Doyoung is here, and he’s looking at Jaehyun as though he’s committing the details of his face to memory. 

“You said you weren’t going to come,” and Jaehyun wants to hit himself the moment the words are out. There’s no time, and he doesn’t want to fight, and there are far more important things Jaehyun aches to say.

Doyoung’s lips twist unhappily as the memory of their recent fight floats to the surface, but he shakes his head.

“You’re leaving,” Doyoung states, and his eyes dart in different directions in the all too familiar way when Doyoung is trying to hold back tears. It breaks him, and Jaehyun drops his bag to pull Doyoung into a tight embrace, closing his eyes and taking a deep inhale of the warm cotton scent that has long become his home.

“I’m sorry,” Jaehyun muffles wetly into Doyoung’s shoulder, and he fists his hands into Doyoung’s soft sweater. “I’m sorry, Doyoung, I was being an idiot when I said all of those things, I didn’t mean them, I want you here, of couse I do,” he rushes to say, and he can hear the tiny sniffles that escape Doyoung.

“I –”

There’s not enough time. He realises it the same time Doyoung does as an announcement plays for his flight, and he is reluctantly pulled away as Doyoung looks at him in the eyes.

“You have to go,” Doyoung whispers, and his Adam's apple bobs twice, swallowing the bitter truth.

Jaehyun is leaving, and doesn't know when he'll be back, doesn't know if he'll ever have the chance to say these words to Doyoung.

"I love you."

The tears that spill out down Doyoung's cheeks mirror the wetness on Jaehyun's own face.

"I love you, Doyoung."

When Doyoung kisses him, Jaehyun feels as though he is experiencing the worst heartbreak in the world. Doyoung's kisses reply _i love you too,_ but they're as much as a goodbye as a confession. _I'm not mad at you for leaving, I'm mad at myself for not telling you sooner._

They're both flushed by the time they pull apart, and Doyoung exhales shakily. "Take care of yourself there. Stay safe. Make new friends-"

Jaehyun cuts him off by kissing Doyoung for the second and last time. He pours everything into the kiss, engrains the moment in his mind, wishes he could bottle this fleeting moment. Doyoung pulls away and pushes him with unsteady hands. 

“Go.”

Jaehyun opens and closes his mouth.

"Go. I'll always be here. I think I'll always love you, Jaehyun," Doyoung murmurs, and Jaehyun doesn't understand how Doyoung can stand there and say things like that and expect Jaehyun to walk away with his heart torn open and bleeding on the tiled floor.

"but let yourself fall in love." Doyoung wipes the tears on Jaehyun's face with his thumbs, who smiles weakly.

"I don't know if that's possible."

"Of course it it is." Doyoung sounds heart achingly confident, and Jaehyun wishes Doyoung wasn't so selfless when it came to breaking his own heart.

"You have so much love to give," and Jaehyun can't help but laugh at the joke he would always make being used against him now. "It's true," Doyoung insists firmly, and his lips also tick upwards. 

“Promise me you'll try."

"I'll try. For you." They both know how ironic it sounds, but they understand.

Doyoung inhales slowly, closes his eyes before releasing his breath. There's a genuine smile on his face now, and Jaehyun knows that this is it.

He waves to his friends one last time, drinks in the beautiful smile of the person he loves, and walks through the gates. 

He doesn't look back. 

**Author's Note:**

> feedback and ideas are appreciated!


End file.
